Sunday, January 13, 2008

Terminator: The TV Series

So, since Heroes is all done until next Fall (at least) Fox decided to make its own ridiculously awesome TV show that has time travel and is targeting nerds and plays on Mondays at 9. What this means to me is that I have something new to spend all my time thinking about (and I don't have to only talk about NBC shows for once).

So, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. My thoughts: I like. Although, so far, Sarah Connor doesn't exactly feel like the main character. She seems weak at the start. She's all: "I'm not comfortable with the idea of settling down with a new man and getting married, so I'm going to run away with no explanation, but then forget to start using a new cover name and therefore make my son and myself easy to find again". Kind of lame.

Significantly more awesome would be her husband-to-be taking a spray of machine gun bullets to the face when the terminators find them because he had hoped to surprise her by putting an announcement of their engagement in the newspaper, thereby blowing their cover and reminding her of why she can't allow herself to settle down with anyone, ever. But, that's just my opinion. I guess this way provides the possibility that sometime mid-season she can drop in on her ex and say, "Sorry, it just wasn't the right time and, by the way, could you help us blow up a secret underground government facility?"

I guess, though, my real problem with Sarah Connor is that she isn't being played by Linda Hamilton. I mean, seriously, Linda Hamilton was the shit in T2. She was all fire and brimstone and looked like she could kick anyone's ass ten different ways without breaking a sweat. In a totally hot way, though, of course. Lena Headey, on the other hand, has the muscle, but I'm still waiting on the attitude. This is supposed to be her story, but so far (note that so far is exactly 1 episode) she's just been in it for the ride. She only has one instance of awesomeness at this point (which involved immediately attempting to kill herself the instant she realized she had been caught by a terminator as the only available way to protect John, but the terminator was able to stop her from even taking her own life).

Then there's John. And, well, I gotta say, this is a very different high school aged John since T2 (note that I am pretending that Terminator 3 never happened, and we're all just going to keep it that way, alright? Good. Even this show is doing that, so it's okay). This John, played by Thomas Dekker, who was Claire's awesome boy toy from Heroes season 1 (not the lame dude who could fly and whine and that's about all from season 2) is, well, kind of a pussy. 15 years ago, it was okay for John Connor to be a charismatic, but troublesome, genius/rebel. Nowadays, he's all: "Mom, help me. I can't deal with terminators trying to kill me." I can't help but miss the old John Connor who was scared, but also excited that all the crazy things his mom had been telling him were actually true. That John Connor was totally ready and willing to one day step up and be the rebel leader. This John Connor is begging his mom to make sure he never has to. Also, Thomas Dekker might be a little too pretty to be John Connor, but I'll let it slide, since I liked him so much in Heroes (and an episode of House, according to IMDB, which I vaguely remember now that I think about it).

And then there's River. Er, Cameron. Or, er, Summer Glau. Whatever, her name is River. I'd like to start by presenting her with the 3rd Hottest Creature Living on Planet Earth Award. This is an impressive achievement, considering it puts her only behind Jessica Alba (who got 1st for her portrayal of Nancy in Sin City as well as Crazy Hot Nextdoor Neighbor Chick in Idle Hands, and for countless other appearances, post Dark Angel) and Anna Paquin (who got 2nd for her portrayal of Rogue in X-Men, as well as countless appearances as jailbait in independent movies). It finally knocks Rachel Leigh Cook out of 3rd (which is good since Rachel Leigh Cook is incapable of being in a movie worth seeing for any reason besides staring at Rachel Leigh Cook, but she got bonus points for doing the voice of Tifa in Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, and I was alright with staring at Tifa).

For me, the most awesome thing is that in Firefly, I didn't really think of River as hot. She was cute, but the whole idiot savant thing just wasn't really my type. Also, Morena Baccharin had this habit of stealing all of my attention whenever she was onscreen. For that matter, Nathan Fillion had that same habit. And Alan Tudyk, now that I think about it. So, yeah, it just wasn't a fair environment for judging. And, even in the movie when she got to kick ass like it was going out of style, I was too distracted by the awesomeness of seeing Firefly on the big screen to notice that River was the 3rd Hottest Creature Living on Planet Earth. But, thankfully, she's back. And awesome. And ridiculously hot. As far as I'm concerned, this could just be called: Terminator: The River is Back and Hotter Than Ever Chronicles.

Also, there's something I'm a little confused about. Since she's a terminator sent from the future, I've been assuming that she's an android. However, all the advertising materials for the show call her a cyborg. Now, this is an important distinction, because if she has some human parts (like, for example, human emotions) she and John can totally fall in love. On the other hand, if she's an android, John can still fall in love with her, except that it would just be part of her programming and John's future self that sent the android has a really sick sense of humor. Note that John will fall in love with her in any case, because I'm pretty sure it would be physically impossible for a human male with fully functioning mental capacities to do anything else (yes, I am now in love with her, my mental capacities are functioning normally, thank you very much).

John has already commented that she seems different from other terminators he's interacted with (you know, since she's not a former Mister Universe from Austria). Her response is that she is different (apparently, she realizes that she's not the current governor of California as well). But, this could be a hint that she is actually a cyborg (and therefore different). Of course, it could also mean that future John Connor has a REALLY sick sense of humor and sent back a ridiculously hot terminator AND programmed her to be mysterious as well, just to make it even more impossible not to fall head over heels in love with her. Also, furthering my suspicions that future John Connor has a sick sense of humor, the way that River initially attempts to get close to him is by hitting on him, showing that she's basically been programmed to take advantage of the fact that she is crazy good-looking and be John's love interest first and guardian second.

On the other hand, in defense of the "Future John Connor is NOT a Sick Bastard and River is Part Human" viewpoint, it would probably be safe to assume that if she is part human, she grew up post-apocalypse and is inexperienced with the world and therefore doesn't totally know how to act (although she pulled off super-cute girl who's totally interested in John pretty well). Plus, if she volunteered for the mission, it probably means that in her timeline, she totally idolized Future John Connor as an unattainable savior of sorts (who was way too old for her) and so she can't help but take this opportunity to be his savior and hope to get him to return her feelings. Plus, Future John Connor would probably totally have a thing for this young girl but he would know that he's too old for her and so he'd be willing to send her into the past just so his past self in an alternate timeline can be with her. Well, if I were future John Connor, that's how I'd think about it...

But, so yeah, I'm excited about this show. I totally enjoyed this evening's episode. And, in a dose of extra awesomeness, I get to watch another episode tomorrow night. Man, life couldn't get too much better (except, of course, if Terminator: The River is Back and Hotter Than Ever Chronicles was preceded with new episodes of Chuck instead of Prison Break).

Not too mention, this upcoming Friday is 01-18-08. Life is so awesome, right now.

That is all.


Update (about 10 minutes later):
So, I went and read up on some stuff. According to an interview with Summer Glau she is "the most human Terminator ever created". So, at this point, I'm leaning towards Future John Connor is a sick bastard. Also, it's been pointed out that she was able to eat a potato chip in the pilot, which suggests she has some digestive capabilities (apparently, I'm oblivious because I remember her declining his offer of potato chips and apparently she later took one...I guess I was too busy staring at some part of her body besides her hands...). Also, I've noticed that River looks a lot like a younger, hotter version of Sigourney Weaver...I think she should be in some random restart of Aliens as well.

That is all.

No comments: